My New Year's Resolution: Practicing Good Consent , |
And I also think consent
is important outside of the bedroom. Here's a recent example: I was in
a really bad mood. I was surprised steam wasn't coming out of my ears
(that kind of frustrating and angry bad mood). My housemate came up to
me and asked if he could support me by patting my back or something
like that. And I told him no. It was much more supportive and relieving
to have him ask me then for him to freak me out by touching me, know
what I mean? In the 'bedroom' (or tent as was the case), the first time that a partner of mine actively and persistently sought verbal consent
from me, I was blown away. (I was also at a queer gathering in central
Tennessee.) It was not only hott and fun, but it made me feel
safer. This experience also made me realize that I was relying on my
partners to ask me if something is ok, and not often enough was I the
one asking the questions. So I identified one way that I could work on
practicing good consent, and I'm still working on it. I'll admit though, I started my new years resolution early. This week I started reading a new zine that's hot off the presses: Learning Good Consent. It
has really revved me up for the new year. There are submissions from
people and organizations all over the country with folks giving advice,
telling about their experiences, and saying really honestly "I have
never been able to figure out a way to talk comfortably about consent" and then trying to do it anyway. Whether you've been practicing consent
since your five-year-old self asked that cutie on the playground if
they wanted to hold hands, or you don't think you know much about it at
all, I *strongly* urge you to check this out. cross-posted from Amplify Your Voice. |